Tornados are part of the standard fare of springtime in Oklahoma. Truthfully, most of the people I know get a bit desensitized to the tornado warnings.

Me too. But sometimes we get a wake-up call.

A colleague of mine was driving back to Oklahoma City from the south part of the state when the warning sirens went off. Listening to the radio, she could follow the storm’s track.

She thought she was driving right into it, so she turned around and went the opposite way.

Then the storm changed directions. She turned again. And again.

Turns out there were multiple potential funnel clouds, going in various directions.

Having grown up here, she instinctively looked for the safest place to pull off the interstate and park: lowest level, away from power lines.

That’s when she spotted a farmhouse, and ended up on the porch of a total stranger, asking if she could join them in their storm shelter.

It’s one thing to knock on a neighbor’s door and ask to borrow a cup of sugar. It’s another thing altogether to ask a person you’ve never met if they can keep you safe during a storm.

There are many “tornados” in the business world, things that threaten our safety.

Customers’ needs change, financing options become limited, technology fails (always when we need it most!), marketing efforts wither, key employees leave (and become your competitors), even good news like record-breaking sales put a strain on the system.

How comfortable are you asking for help when you need it? How do you know if you have become desensitized to the “storm warnings?”

Every business person needs a support system. Smart business leaders get their support system in place before the warning sirens go off.

Help is all around you. Look for people with the experience, connections and perspective that you may lack within your company.

Here’s a short list of ten external resources you can turn to:

• Management consultants
• HR consultants
• Financial consultants
• CPA’s
• Attorneys
• Bankers
• Peer advisory groups (like EWF – okay, that was self-serving…)
• Business coaches
• Industry experts & trade associations
• Customer councils

When you have tough decisions to make, when you are lost in the weeds, when life goes off course, you need people who will challenge your thinking. You need people who are not desensitized to the “storm warnings” you may have overlooked because you live with them every day.

Whose porch do you end up on when you need help?

When my inbox is overflowing with replies to a blog post, I know I have tapped a nerve. Apparently the concept of “empowerment” is as highly charged for others as it is for me!

Here’s what other women and men have to say about empowering women.

“Loved this newsletter!  I think some women have an intense issue to be empowered...what they don’t realize is that they already HAVE all the power they need inside themselves. For me personally, I feel powerful in WHO I AM right now.

I do enjoy the ‘good job,’ ‘kudos!’ and ‘I'm proud of you!’ comments from those around me.  I think many woman confuse the desire for the ‘pat on the back’ with our power…I can give my position of power away, and someone else can GIVE me a higher position of power.  It is the give and take that is all within my OWN power to accept or decline! Thanks for a good read for giving me reason to pause and consider this today.”

Renee Russell

Heaven and Earth Music

“Point of View from a MAN…I think it is true both ways.  There are men that need that same kind of reassurance from a woman; seeking approval or asking to be ‘empowered’ by them… As an employer, we need to empower our employees, but as owners, I will leave that to the experts. My short answer…women should feel empowered from within. I liked your question! “

Richard Myers

President

Delta Leadership Incorporated

“The first thing I thought was, ‘I don’t need to BE empowered, I AM empowered.’ [Yet] Women here in the US are still at only about 70% of the salary range of an equally qualified male.  I would have thought by our generation this mentality would change.”

Angela K. White

President

Wave Technologies

Coptic Communications, Inc.

“The struggle for power is timeless. And, women and men certainly view their own power differently. I think this comes from where we as women draw our power versus men. Personally, I feel my power is drawn from my view of myself, I see myself as beautiful, smart, funny, intelligent and in control of my own destiny - all those things feed my power, my confidence and my ability to assert myself in a fair minded way, be it in business or in my personal life.

I'm sure there are women out there who try and ‘take’ power from the other people in the room. I know I've encountered a few overly competitive women who don't know how to work together. People like that are insecure - grasping at anyone they can take down to lift themselves up - at any way to make someone look bad so they look better, stronger, more powerful! But it's not real power. Women who are kind, smart, assertive, confident, generous, forgiving, but refuse to be walked over, ‘handled’ or subservient - those are the truly powerful women - like you and me!”

Felina Rivera-Brown

I love hearing your opinions!  Just email me at This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it .

This week I had an interesting conversation with a husband-wife team who own a business together. Since I work only with female business owners, I wasn’t sure why Mr. Biz owner sat in on my conversation with Ms Biz owner, but I didn’t ask any questions.

I could tell that my “women only” service made him uncomfortable because he went over the top professing that his wife made her own decisions, that he’d never told her she couldn’t do something. When a man has to work that hard to convince me he’s not a chauvinist, I get a little skeptical.

I listened politely but soon became weary of his campaign to convince me that he’s a progressive kind of guy. Then he dropped the “E” word. “My wife is an empowered woman,” he said.

I couldn’t resist. “Well you sound like a pretty empowered man to me,” I replied cheerfully. That’s when he got red in the face and sputtered, “I don’t have to be empowered. I’m a man!” I doubt they’ll invite me to dinner.

So why is it that women need to be empowered, but men get offended at the thought of being empowered. Ah, they already power! To be empowered implies that we don’t have power and someone has to give it to us, as proven by this man’s reaction to me complimenting him on how empowered he is.

Perhaps it's accurate to think about "empowering" women in developing countries who live in cultures where the role of women is much more limited than here in th US.  But do American women really need to be empowered? 

So ladies, how do you feel about your own power? Do you feel comfortable embracing your own power or do you believe someone needs to empower you?

If you want to explore the issue of power in more depth, you’ll enjoy my DVD about women and power. Buy it today and get a free t-shirt.

Go ahead. Be an Alpha Mare.

Let’s talk about a delicate subject. Money. Your money. What you make, your own compensation. I know, it’s not polite to talk about politics, sex or money, but I’m tired of seeing tired of seeing women business owners shortchange themselves (literally!).

What do you believe you deserve to be paid? Seriously, what do you think your compensation should be, based on your expertise, wisdom, knowledge and all the blood, sweat, and tears you have put into your business?

Is that what you’re making? If so, you can quit reading right here, because the rest of what I have to say is for the thousands of women business owners who are not paying themselves what they are worth.

Ask yourself, “Would someone buy my business and run it for the same compensation I receive?” If the answer is no, it’s time to make some changes.

I often see women business owners generate enough revenue to hire the people they need, purchase the equipment they need, spend the marketing dollars they need, and simply take what little is left over at the end for themselves. If that’s what you are doing, it’s not a condemnation of you. It’s a clue that something in the business needs to change.

I’m suggesting that if there is not enough to compensate you for what you are truly worth, it’s time to re-examine your business model and face the brutal fact that if your business can’t compensate you, you need to find a business strategy that is more successful.

Of course it is common in the start up phase to take little or no compensation out of the business or to put profits back into the business. But at some point that has to stop. At some point you need to balance the needs of the business with your personal needs.

Looking at what you deserve to earn provides a fast (although sometimes painful) wake-up call that will lead you to make the necessary changes in your business.

So here’s what I want you to do.

• Decide what your compensation should be. This can and should be based on a variety of factors. Here are two articles that can help you determine what makes sense: http://bit.ly/EntrepSalary & http://bit.ly/NFIBcomp.
• Print out your 2010 budget. Okay, I know, you don’t have a budget. Pull up your 2009 income and expense statement and export it to an Excel spreadsheet.
• In the line item that says “Owners Salary” plug in the number you answered above. Doesn’t matter if it’s $24,000 a year or $250,000 a year. Let’s just see what happens.
• Now look at how that affects your bottom line. My guess is that you have a big, negative number under net profits now.

What you have just seen in that big, negative number is the reality of what you need to fix to make your business worth your time and effort.

What needs to change in your business for you to finally begin to earn what you are worth? How does putting your desired compensation into your budget as a legitimate number change the way you think about your business?

It’s only by paying yourself what you are worth that you will have an accurate portrayal of the true costs of running your business. It’s time to ask yourself what you are worth and design a business model that compensates you at the level you deserve.